Stuck Inside Various American Films

Someone threw a brick through the window to
warn me to stop being so goddamn rebellious.
This guy hid in the bathroom at the party
to ask me out. I totally said yes!
I left my three kids and John Travolta
to be with Sean Penn. I love the guy.
I was a whore with a big mouth
and dental floss until Richard Gere rescued me.
I worked in a paper factory dreaming of Moscow
until Richard Gere rescued me.
I was slutting around Gilley's until John Travolta rescued me.
I was stuck in a marriage with a lying cheating
son of a bitch until cancer rescued me.
I was stuck on the same Beach Boys song
each day more of the same with pineapples and what not
until Adam Sandler rescued me.
I carried a watermelon.
I was an Aussie virgin hopelessly devoted to John Travolta.
I tried to fuck Penelope Cruz outta Tom Cruise's consciousness.
Did not work.
I chose Ethan Hawke over Ben Stiller. Fucking duh.
I begged Gary Oldman to kill me with a knife.
Val Kilmer killed my duck.
I chose Meatloaf over Alice Cooper.
I asked my boyfriend to take Sissy Spacek to the prom.
Marlon Brando raped me and made me
lose the tenuous grasp
I had
on reality.